(This is an experience I had racing the Iditabike; 350 miles un-supported multi-day mountain bike winter event in Alaska; It is a story of an encounter I had with wolves and being sleep deprived/exhausted.)
Cold, clear nights keep me moving at a good pace – which puts me closer to the end of my journey. Do I actually want to cross the finish line or would I rather keep on riding into the Alaskan abyss… I wake up just before my body slams into the ground. I am drunk tired, crashing on the ice, my bike on top of me. I lay contemplating my situation. I just want to rest, not move… I am so comfortable. I get up and keep on riding. I feel like a delinquent who took the RIGHT path in life, nobody to blame.
My mind drifts from the urge to control my thoughts and staying upright on my bike to the lights that appear in the distance. Would it be people… one or two fellow racers?!
I focus on the movement of light in the distance. I am dreaming of conversation, interaction… it would be such a “warm” feeling. Hours go by… was I dreaming?
I am not getting closer to the subtle lights I see in the distance, still so far away. There is sound… my wheels spinning on squeaky snow but no voices. I am trying so hard to make sense of all this…it’s just like being in physics class again. My eyes are rolling in and out of consciousness. A campfire warms my face….but there is no fire… I hit the ground again, so disappointed that I am only dreaming. The lights, still obvious in the distance, pull me… I don’t trust my vision, I feel my way.
The lights are finally moving towards me, very low, knee level, side by side and they multiply the closer they get. Confused, I am not sure what is real or not but I know I AM WAKING-UP.
Reality washes over me like icy water. A pack of wolves are enjoying the “midget” riding her bike… ME. Live entertainment on a dark Alaskan night. My shock and realization make them run away, vanishing into the surrounding void. Alone again, I miss the company that kept me going for the past few hours of the long black night. I do not know to dream or fear the moment. I’m sure I will not bivy tonight…I will keep moving for the rest of the night, at a good pace and for good reasons…. hoping to fall back into the abyss.
Running across the Sahara desert
(Accounts from the Marathon of Sand, a 250km, unsupported, running race across the sahara desert of Morocco – April 2006) Chloë Lanthier, endurance ambassador.
Acceptance… a torturous reality.
My main focus is to keep moving forward.
I’m running through an ocean of heat waves.
I dream of clouds, wind, rain, cold drinklable water, I even visualize winter but I’m left with an afternoon of intense heat; 47 celcius, record levels of humidity and a horizon of yellow dunes.
I’ve been running across the Sahara desert for 4 days and have 3 days to go.
I mentally try to control the effects of the heat on my body. My thoughts are drifting between desperation and reality.
It's all about acceptance since the heat never goes away, it consumes me. The sahara is one of the most reflective places on earth – a heat trap; brutal, disorienting, but extremely beautiful.
My days couldn’t be more simple and intense at the same time; I run, grow thirsty and imagine cold water, over and over again.
Coming from a Rocky Mountain winter my senses are jolted.
Instead of worrying about frostbite & hyperthermia, I monitor my sunburns, I strategize hydration to prevent heatstroke. The snow storms have become sand storms…. The grizzly bears and the moose are traded for scorpions.
My hands tremble and swell, I suffer from extreme dry mouth, tightening of my throat that marks the onset of deep thirst. Each day by early-afternoon, the sun burns me from below and above and the sand storms blister my burning skin.
I finally see a well, the only one I will run into all week. I grab the rope and drop the filled bucket on my head, not clear enough to drink but cold enough to cool my senses.
The essence of the desert is its overwhelming power that transform pain, exhaustion and weakness into comfort, strength and connectedness with myself and the land.
This “misery” brings me to the most serene head space I could ask for. My demons have become my power to run faster. The beauty of the sky blending in the dunes and only a horizon to focus on as a finish line. I’m exhausted but feeling good.
I am where I’m suppose to be – Running, growing thirsty and dreaming of winter… and realizing how much water we waist at home!
